


read between the lines (I am catastrophically in love with you)

by burning_lesbian_trash



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Childhood Friends, Epistolary, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Growing Up, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Mentioned Kageyama Tobio, Mentioned Ushijima Wakatoshi, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Pining, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 17:40:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29861703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/burning_lesbian_trash/pseuds/burning_lesbian_trash
Summary: Tooru has always found it easier to write the things he's too scared to say to Hajime.(Or a series of notes between Tooru and Hajime that depict the challenges that come with growing up and falling in love)
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 4
Kudos: 42





	read between the lines (I am catastrophically in love with you)

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic and I am actually so proud of it. I love iwaoi with my whole being and this is my love letter to them. (ha see what I did there)
> 
> A little note is that the words crossed out can only be seen by the person who wrote them and you.  
> Oikawa is italics and Iwaizumi is normal.

_hey Iwa_

yes

_my girlfriend broke up with me after school_

maybe she discovered your shitty personality

_rude! at least I can get a girlfriend stupid_

I don’t want a girlfriend ~~I have you~~

~

_hey Iwa_

what Trashykawa

_I think there’s something wrong with me_

so you finally figured it out

_no I'm serious_

what is it

_I didn’t like my girlfriend_

well you broke up so that doesn’t matter

_but I never like my girlfriends_

why date them then

_I’m don’t know I don’t think I ever wanted to_

okay then don’t date anymore

_~~I think I like you~~ I couldn’t do that to the ladies! _

you’re such an asshole

~

_hey Iwa_

what is it

_Kageyama’s great isn’t he_

I guess he’s pretty good

_yeah_

is something wrong

_it’s nothing_

~

_hey Iwa_

yeah

_I like boys_

~~I think I do too~~ okay

_do you hate me_

why the hell would I hate you

_~~Mum~~ people say gay people are disgusting ~~do you think I’m disgusting~~_

they’re stupid

_right_

you’re not disgusting Oikawa

_aww you really do care about me!_

fuck off Shittykawa

~

_hey Iwa_

yeah

_I'm not good enough am I_

what the hell of course you are

_Iwa I’m barely better than Kageyama and he’s a first year_

you’re so stupid you shouldn’t measure your worth based on other people

_that’s pretty poetic Iwa I didn’t know you had it in you_

I’m going to kill you

~

_hey Iwa_

yes Shittykawa

_I think I’m going to come out to my parents today_

good luck

_what if they hate me_

it ~~’s impossible to hate you~~ if they do I’ll beat them up

_that’s sweet Iwa-chan_

tell me how it goes okay

_of course Iwa-chan_

~

_hey Iwa_

?

_I told my parents today_

how’d it go

_it didn’t go well_

shit what did they say

_Dad left_

and your mum?

_Mum said good sons don’t like boys_

they’re idiots

_maybe she’s right_

no dumbass you were born like this ~~you’re perfect~~ and if they can’t understand that then it’s their fault

_I don’t know what to do_

hey it’s going to be okay I’m here for you

_you’re so lucky you’re straight_

no I’m not

_what do you mean_

I’m bi

_when did you find that out_

I figured it out a few weeks ago

_sorry Iwa-chan_

you wanna go get milk bread and watch Alien?

_your treat!_

I hate you

_you love me_

~~yeah I do~~ let’s go Trashykawa

~

_hey Iwa_

yes dummy

_my parents told me I shouldn’t spend time with you anymore_

what the fuck why

_they say I’m a bad influence on you_

that doesn’t make any sense

_they said they wouldn’t want you to turn out the same way I did_

that’s bullshit

_really_

yes you moron there’s nothing wrong with liking boys

_okay_

I wouldn’t stop hanging out with you just because they say so anyway

_~~neither~~ Iwa-chan is such a softie! _

~

_hey Iwa_

yeah

_I’m sorry_

for what

_for what happened with Kageyama_

apologise to him then

_I will just are you angry with me_

no but you destroying yourself over stupid things makes me angry

_sorry_

I just don’t want to see you get hurt okay

_okay_

~

_hey iwa_

yeah

_~~I think I’m in love with you I think I’ve always been in love with you and I don’t know how to stop~~ I’m excited for high school _

~~what did you cross out~~ me too

~

_hey Iwa_

?

_what if the team doesn't like me_

shut up you’re a great setter they’ll like you

_aww does this mean Iwa-chan likes me_

I’d rather have my eyes plucked out by birds than admit that

_but you didn’t deny it ;)_

~

_hey Iwa_

yes Shittykawa

_we’re going to beat Ushiwaka at least once right_

of course idiot

_Iwa-chan is so mean to me_

cos i have to deal with your bullshit every day

_~~do you really believe that~~ hey you should be honoured to spend time with me _

~

_hey Iwa_

?

_I don’t know what to do_

with what

_like a job_

do what you like

_Mum says I should get a stable job and get married_

don’t listen to her do what makes you happy

_Iwa-chan always knows the best thing to say_

shut up Trashykawa

_I just complimented you and this is what you say to me :0_

I’m just being honest

_rude!_

~

_hey Iwa_

yes

_do you ever wanna get married_

what

_like in the future with a nice girl_

why does it matter

_~~so i can be prepared for when you break my heart~~ just curious_

I’d need to be in love with them but yeah

_that’s gonna be hard once they meet me ;)_

fuck off Shittykawa

~

_hey Iwa_

what’s up

_my parents are fighting_

fuck

_I want them to stop so bad_

hey all couples have rough patches I’m sure it’ll be okay

_I hate it so much though_

whenever they’re fighting come to mine okay

_okay_

~

_hey Iwa_

?

_I think I want to play volleyball professionally_

oh cool

_what about you_

I don’t think so

_why ~~is it because of me~~_

I just don’t love it as much as you do

_ha Iwa-chan only likes volleyball when it’s with me!_

~~Yeah~~ shut up idiot

~

_hey Iwa_

what’s up

_do you like anyone_

~~you~~ no

_okay_

~

_hey Iwa_

what

_where are you thinking of going for uni_

~~wherever you go~~ I don’t know stupid where are you going

_~~with you~~ I’ve had some offers_

already?

_don’t act surprised Iwa-chan I am amazing after all_

now I have to act surprised

~

_hey Iwa_

yeah

_my parents are getting a divorce_

shit Oikawa I’m so sorry

_it’s not your fault_

are you okay

_I will be_

I’ll go get the milk bread

~

_hey Iwa_

yes

_you’ll never leave me right_

~~why would I leave someone I love?~~ I don’t think I could get rid of you even if I wanted to

~

_hey Iwa_

what

_~~I love you~~ nevermind _

?

~

_hey Iwa_

yeah

_I’m sorry we never went to nationals_

it’s okay

_no it’s not I let you down I promised myself you’d get to go at least once_

idiot you could never let me down

_but you cried_

yeah I was upset but not with you

_I don’t want you to be upset at all_

I’ll get over it

_wanna rewatch Godzilla?_

sure

~

_hey Iwa_

what’s up

_I got an offer_

oh?

_to play in Argentina_

oh

_yeah_

are you gonna take it

_I'm not sure_

~~say no~~ it’s a great opportunity

_I know_

there’s nothing holding you back here

_yes there is_

what is it

_you really don’t know?_

no

_it’s really important to me_

~~then stay~~ you shouldn’t let anything get in the way of your dreams no matter how important it is

_Iwa-chan is so dense_

~~please don’t go~~ fuck off Shittykawa

~

_hey Iwa_

what

_I’m in ~~love with you~~_

moron that doesn’t make any sense

_your face doesn’t make any sense_

idiot that’s barely an insult

~

_hey Iwa_

yeah

_I don’t think I’m going to Argentina_

why the fuck not

_it doesn’t matter why_

is this about that thing holding you back?

_yeah_

you’re being stupid Oikawa

_no I’m not_

it’s not worth staying for something that gets in the way of everything you’ve been working for

_I’ve already told them I’m not going you can’t change my mind ~~and anyway you mean more to me than volleyball ever will~~_

~~good~~ I don’t want you to regret this

_I won’t_

~

_hey Iwa_

what is it

_I’m in love with ~~you~~ someone_

oh

_I don’t know how to tell them_

~~I love you I love you I love you please don’t do this to me~~ just be honest

_wow that’s so romantic Iwa-chan I wonder why you don’t have a girlfriend_

whatever

~

_hey Iwa_

yes

_I got into Waseda_

same

_are you gonna go_

~~if you are~~ probably

_same!_

great

_you should be overjoyed that you get another three years with me Iwa-chan_

I ~~am~~ not

_:(_

~

_hey Iwa_

what Shittykawa

_do you wanna get an apartment together?_

okay

_yay!_

~

_hey Iwa_

yeah

_look in your bag_

~

_Dear Hajime, As you can tell, I find it easier to write about the stuff I’m too scared to say, so why wouldn’t this be any different? If you’ve ever wondered what I cross out in these little notes of ours, this is it:_

_I’m in love with you._

_I’ve been in love with you for so long I can’t remember a time that I wasn’t. Maybe the universe is kind, because it helped me find you, and now I am yours.You know me better than I know myself and you mean more to me than anyone I will ever meet. Words don’t do justice to how much I love you._

_I know you don’t feel the same, but let me stay. Being with you even as friends is enough for me._

Dear Tooru, You’re an idiot for thinking I don’t love you too.

**Author's Note:**

> Iwaizumi kept the notes.


End file.
